Pam Ponders

Be Careful of meetings with persons of the Opposite Sex. Smilar to flirting, close friendships with persons of the opposite sex can be a problamatic for your relationship.

You are a faithful spouse and as far as you’re concerned, any friendship with the opposite sex is nothing more than friendship and that is how it should be treated. A friendship.

How easy is it for one person to give in to temptation and before two innocent friends of the opposite sex know it, they are ingrossed in an affair. This scenario has been repeated to me countless times by the majority of couples who have seen their marriage torn apart. 

Why take the risk? If your marriage problem is top priority to you, you will give up unnecessary risks that could damage it. I know this might mean a painful loss of a friendship. But if this friendship is a danger to the most important relationship in your life, what kind of choice do you really have?

I have a disclaimer to this statement because it is not an all or nothing
proposition and it does not always lead to good divorce advice. There are some long-term opposite-sex friendships that are not threatening to the marriage. These would be determined on a case-by-case basis and would include only those relationships that do not in any way threaten the spouse. In general, be leery of friendships with people of the opposite gender. An innocent oposite sex friendship may just prove to be the final blow.

I once heard the following story: Allyson always wanted to have piano lessons. For as long as she could remember she had wanted to learn to play the piano. So, for one of her birthdays, her husband, Ted, got her a year’s worth of piano lessons. Allyson was overwhelmed with the gift. Ted had really touched her and she was very emotional about it. It was a wonderful moment between them.

When the piano instructor showed up on the first day, he turned out to be a strapping, muscular young man that was quite handsome. This was the piano teacher Ted chose for Allyson because he had a reputation as a magnificent pianist and a wonderful instructor.

Within six months Allyson was having an affair with her piano teacher, and, when she ultimately told Ted it virtually destroyed their marriage.
Now, of course, the affair wasn’t Ted’s fault. But couldn’t he have been a little
smarter than to higher the handsomest most dashing piano instructor he could
find?

Play it smart and dont invite problems into your mariage. Protect your marriage by building a fence to keep such problems out.

Dr. Bruce Ruston
save-ur-marriage.com