Pam Ponders

Nanette Geiger, Relationship Expert , writes… …

Relationship Coaching for people with self-confidence or self-esteem issues is very helpful in addressing this next question. Women seem to be plagued mostly from self-esteem, abandonment and worthiness issues. Coaching Life for Women is one solution to solve this problem in relationship coaching. Anita asks: “Are some of us just destined to be alone”? Anita, since you responded to our survey concerning relationships and the Law of Attraction, I am going to assume you have been thinking about creating a relationship for yourself. Many people choose to keep away from serious relationships. And that need not be the case for a person who’s given up because they have continuously failed in the past. Nothing at all is wrong with preferring to be without an intimate relationship. Life can be fulfilling and fantastic with any decision you make.

As long as you know you’re deciding that rather than giving up out of frustration that you haven’t found the love of your dreams. You can have it all in a relationship and in your life.

If you could see yourself from the point of view of Source or your Inner Being, or the Universe, you would see a wonderful, fantastic, brilliant, connected being. Then life starts to occur around us. Our oblivious parents, teachers, and elders, in an attempt to guide us, tell us from birth what to watch out for, stop us, caution us, and attempt to protect us, effectively having us listen to their fear and insecurities rather than tuning in to our own energy. OK, I’ll grant you as brand new children we do need support. Fine. But shortly after they understand to do things by themselves, self-empowerment should be part of the training for the small children.

Well-intentioned parents desire to do the best thing so they teach, hold back, admonish, and instil fear in young ones to make them behave. This only creates a level of insecurity and inability. The feeling of not-enoughness gets embedded as a child.

Brain research now explains to us that until the age of 7, we’re so open and available to receive, we have no filtering abilities at all. We go around in a sort of hypnagogic trance and become impressed with whatever comes into our life experience. It’s no wonder we have deeply ingrained, although misguided, beliefs about a flawed nature. By the time we’re 6 years old, we’ve heard the word “NO” approximately 60,000 times. Look out for that, that could hurt you, be careful, do not drop that. The subliminal communication says you are inept, you cannot believe in yourself, you don’t know what you are doing, and so on.

Our parents and elders were certainly well-meaning. They simply intended for our well-being. But you can see how simply we have been trained away from our inherent beauty and brilliance.

I recommend that you go easy with yourself and let yourself have a break. First off, it’s not your fault. It is not even the fault of your elders. They were taught the same way as well. You can stop the perpetration of lower self-esteem on yourself and those you care about. You deserve to have anything you wants.

Do your very best to express yourself appreciation and self-acceptance. Adhere to yourself as you would a beloved child. Forgive her for her shortcomings. The truth is, the Universe adores, Spirit adores you, and your Inner Being loves you. Why? Because you ARE lovable. And that IS the reality!