Pam Ponders

Imagine this situation. There is a social get together. A boy is introduced to a girl. And they began to talk. They will talk for a certain amount of time and then go to their own houses after the party has ended. Unable to forget each other, the boy and girl continually reminisce about their meeting.

The two run into each other quite by accident. Gradually they became good friends after their first date. Love blooms and marriage looms. Bare in mind that they feel they’re destined to be together despite only seeing the brighter portions of each others’ faces. Wedding bells are rung between the pair with the consent and wishes of their senior persons in their family and their well wishers.

The two people are happy and very excited and don’t want to wait to be alone, away from the watching people. They have a wonderful honeymoon but eventually have to return home. Both of them have are working, have a small home and things could not have worked out better than this. They are very happy and when they look at couples that are divorced, they do not believe how bad things can end up when two people start out so much in love. As it stands now, divorce is an unfavorable word for them.

A person’s life is full of fun, laughter and mirth, with each wanting to please the other, there is no difference between the two and all things are good. One day, the wife returns home late from work, only to find that her husband is already home. He is upset that she is late and they have a small argument where she states that she did not say anything when he was late. Slowly but surely, the problems are solved and everthing is OK again. This is only the start.

Days pass by and there are more arguments between the couple over minor issues and more insinuations. Right now, the wife is pregnant and concerned about whether she will still have a career once the baby comes. The baby arrives and their world changes. As a mother’s world now focuses on caring for the little one, the father may appear to be avoiding accountability. There are more arguments everyday as the wife wants to get back to her work and a nanny is to be appointed for the baby.

There are lots of differences that begin to show up between them, and neither wants to be the one to take any blame or to see the reason. The added responsibility is telling on the wife and the career-minded husband is not ready to share any household work. The baby is in definite need of attention from the parents. Love is a distant memory and tolerance is growing thin. For them, no other alternative would be acceptable except to divorce. Friends and well wishers try to intervene and resolve the misunderstanding but all in vain. There is a big divider rearing its ugly head between and that is ego.

Did this need to happen? Could nothing else have worked? They would have been able to, but only if they had managed to see reason and thought with a cool head. Children are born from the love of two people, and no child should have to suffer under any circumstance. No marriage on rocks is beyond redemption, especially, if there is no case of violence or infidelity. Every couple should try to sort out the differences as much as possible instead of trying to go separate ways, legally. Divorce should be last resort when all other amicable solutions fail.

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